Chapter 29: Defining "Soulmate Friendship"

Dear Best Friend: 

I want to tell you why I love you so dearly! There are thousands of reasons why we have been friends for so long and there are even more reasons why we will continue to be best friends throughout our entire lives no matter how many miles separate us. You are my soulmate best friend. I think you can understand what that phrase means, but to be sure I'll go ahead and define a soulmate friendship: 

1. A soulmate best friend is so close to you that your family has added another person to the table when setting up for dinner. It's assumed that you are coming on family vacations, and it's an expectation that you give my parents a call here and there to check in with them while at college. When you and my mother go out to dinner without me I never question it, I just expect it. This friend is typically closer to your family than you are. Your parents might even like them a little bit more because they're less sassy and hormonal than you. She is officially invited to every family gathering and formal dinner. Your family is my family, and my family is yours. 

2. A soulmate best friend is ALWAYS there at 2am to talk about literally anything. Big changes are always easier when your best friend is there to talk it through and tell you that life is actually not as bad as you think. All of my friends know that when they see her name on the caller ID, I have to answer it. When you're 17 hours away from each other you have to rely on the those short 20 minute phone calls to explain every small problem, drunk story, and detailed description of the latest date you've been on. I can't imagine life without the daily phone calls and constant text updates.

3. A soulmate best friend heals your self-image problems and tells you you're beautiful. She will yell positive things at you while you look in the mirror and complain about what you see. She tells you to get off your butt and go workout. She never lets you get down on yourself too hard, or she might just join you and make jokes about it to get you smiling. 

4. A soulmate best friend is always up for a new adventure. Whether that means going on a hike, learning how to sail, visiting a foreign country, or taking on a new city, she is always willing to join. If she doesn't join in on your adventure, she's for sure your number one cheerleader. 

5. A soulmate best friend is fully aware that your enemies are the same. If somebody has seriously wronged either of you, there's no chance you could ever forgive them until the other does. Every boyfriend is formally warned that if he hurts your best friend, he will regret it. It's a mutual understanding that you've got each other's back under any circumstance. 

6. A soulmate best friend makes you laugh above all else. I mean laugh. Until you can't breathe. Laugh until your bladder is unexpectedly full and you cannot make it to the bathroom. You're supposed to have jokes with this friend that you can laugh about years down the road. Sometimes all it takes is a few words to trigger these memories and then you start speaking in this weird language that nobody else understands except you two. The greatest, most defining moments of your friendship come from the giggle attacks that strike at any given time. 

7. A soulmate best friendship lasts through ANYTHING. It's the type of friendship where honesty and discussions are so, so necessary. Being real with one another when you're upset about something and talking it through right away keeps the friendship strong. It's about learning how to forgive each other, recognizing that the friendship is more important than life itself and moving on. Dealing with conflict maturely and staying true to one another at all times is key! The friendship is never affected by the little things that would tear other people apart. 

8. MOST IMPORTANTLY, you NEVER say goodbye to your soul sister, you only say "see you later." You're both fully aware that way too much time will pass before you can have sleepovers every night and have too many laughing fits, but you choose to ignore the issue of time and distance. The continuous cycle of calling each other daily to give life updates and share funny happenings lives on until the next time you're reunited. You've already decided and discussed that the only way to get through life is to end up in the same city. Each "see you later" results in hugging one another tighter than ever and shedding lots of tears. You always ask yourself, "how will I ever survive the next chapter of your life without my partner in crime by my side?" 

But the friendship survives under any condition and you love them no matter what. Not everybody is blessed with a friend like this. If you are, you can probably agree to everything listed. If you haven't found this friend, you will and then you will understand. 

LOVE YOU SO MUCH ELSA! Thanks for being the best person ever. 

xoxo,

Ashley